More Hailey Tales

Christmas is right around the corner, so here are some Hailey stories I'm using as 'stocking stuffers' until I have time to sit down and write out a proper entry.

Hailey's Christmas Picture

Oh...it was a good batch this year. It's really hard to get her to stand still now for pictures - most of the ones I take at home are of the side of her face as she rushes the camera. The portrait ladies at Penney's managed to take some good ones. Every single week after these were taken, she has had some type of bruise or cut on her head from tripping or tantrums.



The picture in the hat is my favorite, but the one with the ornaments is her normal expression - the one she has right before she does something naughty. The way she is hugging those tree decorations convinces me that our tree this year will only be decorated on the top half.


Her Music box

Before Hailey was born, I went online and researched the best crib mobile for babies. I considered the music and length of time it played, the colors and how pattern would stimulate her vision. I read reviews and comments from other parents, and examined how it would attached to her crib. In the end, it was only used a handful of times before she was old enough to pull it down. Yep. Now, the music player, minus the mobile is attached to the outside of her crib. Now, every time she is in her room, the first thing she does is walk over and turn the music on. Sometimes, she will walk down the hallway, move the gate in her doorway (a poor attempt to keep the cat out) turn on the music box, leave the room and move the gate back.

Do you know anyone who turns on the TV then leaves the room...? Apparently my daughter does.

Books

Everyday, I go to work and I look at books. I process books, move books, look books up - occasionally, I'll read a book during lunch. When I come home to relax with my daughter...what is the first thing she does...grab a book for me to read!! In all honesty, I love that she loves books so much. Really, nothing makes me happier than having her plunk herself into my lap to read a story. However...both Nathan and I know the Dr. Suess ABC book by heart, and I wouldn't be at all surprised if I heard him mumbling in the middle of the night that he will 'teach his dog a lot of words'. Books are great - a variety of books, even better!

Tidbit Time

Usually, my blog postings have a specific topic or at least a creative summation. However, some things I need to write down don't always fit into a cohesive post. Here are a small collection of random Hailey thoughts...

Pears

Hailey loves pears...she really LOVES pears! She is so passionate about the Pyrus communis that when she sees it cut up into chunks, she will stuff every single last piece into her mouth until she can't chew. We don't like that, chewing is good, chewing is our friend. IF you are brave enough to withhold the delicious morsels from the ravenous Hailey until she chews what is in her cheeks, you will get an earful! She will cry and scream and drool half chewed pear chunks down her chin until you put the pears away. Then she will cry some more. Uneaten pear chunks go bad quickly - now I know why people usually encase them in Jello.

A.D.D. Dog

As most of us probably know A.D.D ( Attention Deficit Disorder) is a disorder which people may have great difficulty getting or staying focused on a task or activity. Hailey has a specific toy which we call A.D.D. Dog. It is a stuffed electronic dog which says (or sings) a rather large variety of phrases depending on the part of its body you press. The stupid toy is so sensitive that even the slightest touch will send it off on another topic. It rarely finishes a phrase - let alone sings the entire alphabet song. Sometimes just walking past it will be enough for it to ask for a hug. We are constantly barraged with "If You're Happy and You Know It....Green Hand...That Tic....A B C D E...Blue Ear...Let's Sing the...I Love You..." ADD Dog is one of the many things that seemed like a good idea in the store.

The Giggles

Hailey has four distinct types of giggles:

The Chuckle - The Chuckle is a small giggle that is (usually) only one short exhale. This giggle is short, sweet and often the precursor to one of the other three giggles (notably the belly laugh). The Chuckle is distinctive by its pauses - which means she is waiting for you to do something else funny. You most often hear this giggle at the beginning of a game of PEEK!

The Belly Laugh - The Belly Laugh is a long and extended series of chuckles with a very throaty quality. The Belly Laugh incorporates a big, open mouthed smile, nose wrinkling and various arm and leg movements. The Belly Laugh can be produced by a good game of tickle or when Daddy plays airplane.

The Pterodactyl - Be a guest in our home for 15 minutes and Hailey may regale you with The Pterodactyl [also known as The Screech]. While The Pterodactyl is often preceded by The Chuckle, it is not unusual for this distinctive giggle to come out without warning. The Screech is an ear splitting exclamation of pure toddler joy. Occasionally this screech is heard while dining at Applebee's and that will always result in her mother turning bright red. The Pterodactyl will almost always follow immediately after the words "I'm gonna get you". The Screech is done best at a full run.

Evil Giggle - This particular giggle is my favorite giggle. Evil Giggle is the most elusive of the giggle family. Evil Giggle has the deepest tone and a cinematic 'Heh, Heh, Heh' quality to it. Evil giggle is always done in combination with something she shouldn't be doing. The best way to evoke the Evil Giggle is to say "Hailey...NO!" This particular giggle always provokes laughter from adults (although admittedly nervous laughter). It has been heard during the waving of stick like objects. Evil giggle can make you very wary if you are the type of person that enjoys Stephan King novels.

Bug -a -'BOOOoooooo'

O.K. I made some Halloween observations this year

________________________

First off, my friend Jodi, is absolutely correct - Halloween candy has a very particular smell to it (like wax paper and really cheap gum).

When I was young, we used to actually Trick-or-Treat at people's houses. Now kids Trick-or-Treat at the mall or out of the trunks of cars. Really..? 'Mmmm candy and car exhaust! '

Parents used to WALK around their neighborhood with their kids. I get really irritated watching people inch down the kid-packed street in their cars. It's called exercise folks...it's one night a year, you'll survive.

When we got older we went without our parents - now I wish the older kids had parents with them, because some of those kids are just rude! I don't EVER remember asking someone how many pieces of candy I could take.

The big difference in Halloween from my youth is this:

Say, that as a child, you wanted to be Scooby Doo for Halloween...in the 70's this is what you would get: a plastic mask, and a plastic poncho - done. The mask would never stay tight on your face because the elastic holding it up would either stretch or break. In fact, the only reason the mask would stay on at all is because you couldn't help but stick your tongue through the little oval breathing hole. The poncho was normally worn over a winter jacket and would flap in the wind (because the side ties would always break as well). The sad thing is, that as a kid, this was the ultimate Halloween costume!

Fast forward 30 years and $45.00 more and this is the Scooby Doo of Halloween present -

Are you kidding me?!? No mask...how dare they make Halloween more safe! This Scooby Doo actually has a tail, and a collar....and is... brown! Of course you audience has to be a little more actively engaged in your costume presentation since SCOOBY DOO isn't spelled out in glorious plastic. Even so...Jeepers Shaggy!

Kid's costume's are so much cooler now.

Case in point - Hailey was a ladybug for Halloween.

Hailey's second shot at Halloween went very well. We stayed at home and answered the door for most of the evening (at least for all the cute little kids) then we hit the road and went to Uncle Kevin's and Aunt Linda's house. Her Aunt Linda wasn't able to make the Carve and the ladybug outfit was too cute to keep in the confines of our living room.

Hailey had a great time chasing Kevin and Linda's dog Elvis around the couch and giggling up a storm! she even learned how to stand on a chair (sorry Linda).

I just love this little outfit. We call her Bug (or Bug-A-Boo) anyway, so it just kinda fit. Plus (added bonus) the wings were soft, so if her walking got a little too wobbly, she wouldn't get hurt.

In my day the wings would have been wire, covered in flammable material and stapled to the costume with cheap pointy metal.

Of course, being a mom, I think Hailey would look cute if she were head-to-toe in plastic. Maybe next year I can convince her to be a retro Scooby Doo.

No Guts - No Glory

Well...the busy, busy weekend is over and the household survived.

The Pumpkin Carve went well, albeit it was more low-key than it has been in previous years. We had people staggering their arrivals, so carving space was not as hard to find as it usually is. AND...to my total surprise, I don't think Hailey ventured anywhere near the pumpkin guts!! She was clean the whole night (unless you are counting her diaper). Plus she was super damn adorable in her costume - it certainly topped last year's chicken (and that is no easy feat)!!

For those of you who are keeping tabs on the year and a half long kitchen cabinet refinishing project...we put up all the cupboards for the party whether they were done or not. The result of that being that my kitchen looks funny and Hailey's unrestricted access to my cookware has come to an end. I will be finishing each door on an individual basis - so look for our kitchen to be done by Christmas 2009.

This weekend, Nathan and I also were able to attend two GROWN-UP costume parties! No joke! They were both on the same night, so even though we couldn't stay long at either, at least we only had to ask for sitting help for one evening. Apparently Grandma and Grandpa's bedtime is long before Hailey's - so it's a good thing we didn't stay out too late. It was nice to go out and be adults for an evening - even though we were dressed funny!

The only bad part of the weekend was that the marching band that I have been on staff for, lost its bid for a chance at state finals on Saturday night. I couldn't go to the competition with them (I was painting cabinet doors all night) but tried to be with them in spirit. Only the top 10 bands in Michigan can go to state finals and we have been 11th for the past five years - these poor kids can't get a break! It's tough to compete against bands that have 60-70 more performers and a booster budget that can buy 2 plasma TV screens for a band show (no I'm not kidding). Some of my kids would get on my case for saying that - because I'm making excuses for them...but sorry kids, that's what it boils down to. I just want to make sure they know that I am proud that I was on staff for them this year. They worked really hard and their show was a lot of fun. I'm going to miss all my seniors (Kelsey, Becca, Jon, Emily, Emmalee, and Angie, Sara, Megan and Mitchell). I've known some of you for years and this year's graduation is going to be particularly difficult.

So...no guts this weekend for Hailey and no glory for the band. A bittersweet weekend at best. The good news is that my house is clean and I should have a little more time now to get things done ( I'm coming for you cabinets)!

Quick Pic (The Sequel)

I just realized that we took Hailey in for her 1 year photos, and I never posted any of them online....

Call me a Bad Mommy - or - Bad Blogger...

(you be the judge).

She is just the cutest though! The crawling one is my favorite!

Now if there was a toy careening toward the camera, that would totally capture my daughter.

I thought about these pictures today because a group of us gave one of the daycare moms a gift certificate so she could take her little boy in for his first year photographs. Photoshoots are expensive and I just couldn't bear the thought of her not having pictures of him on his most important of birthdays.

I have such an incredible support system in Nathan, our families and friends...it feels really good to do something nice for another mom who is going through a rough patch.



Besides, it gave me the opportunity to buy some boy clothes (I think they are SOOO cute!)

SO...Happy Birthday Christopher! I hope you are a little easier to corral for you photos than Hailey was (crawling baby + still camera = many eye rolls from the JC Penney photographer).

Things that go Bump....

Hello everyone! It's Fall and my favorite time of year - Halloween!!

Our annual Pumpkin Carve is coming up this Sunday...AND...I still don't have the kitchen cabinet doors finished (big surprise). Having guests able to see directly into our cupboards may turn out to be far scarier than any Halloween decoration I could buy!

This year's Carve should be interesting with a toddler running around the house. I am envisioning Hailey covered in pumpkin guts -which we would be scraping off the walls until New Year's. She already likes to reach inside the toilet up to her shoulder, so getting inside a pumpkin would be no big deal! I think my goal this year is not to create the scariest Jack-O-Lantern face, but to try and avoid a stringy, orange daughter and pumpkin gut wallpaper.

As for Hailey's second Halloween costume...I won't blog about her costume until after she wears it and we get pictures - so you all will just have to be patient!! It may end up that she dresses up in pumpkin guts for the 31st.....hmmmm.....

Well...walking is now the preferred method of travel for our big 14 month old! I have to admit, she is really pretty good at it. She can do all the bending necessary to pick up the latest toy projectile and she has mastered the art of the 'lap sit'. Now if we can lengthen her attention span long enough to completely read through "I'll Teach My Dog Lots of Words" we should be all set.

However, there is one obstacle that without fail will send her tumbling to the floor - erupting in a well rehearsed fit...the dog. Poor Hailey...when standing, her head is now exactly the same height as Harley's uncontrollable tail. She gets whacked in the face more times than Curly from the Three Stooges. But...if I'm being honest here...Poor Harley as well! She takes his toys and climbs on him and is generally the center of attention. I scolded him severely the other day because I heard him (lightly) growl at her as she was climbing on him - I didn't know at the time that he made that noise because she stepped on....uh...er....his... 'thing' that shouldn't be stepped on. Suffering through that and all he did was make a slightly ticked off noise...he's a good dog.

Whatever Harley dishes out, Hailey returns the favor. However, instead of retaliating on the dog, she has been taking it out on the kids at daycare. Apparently my darling sweet daughter is a bit of a bully. The other day she got a 'baby time out' for not letting the other kids play with any toys and for hitting them - that includes a 4 year old boy!! Great - my daughter is just like I was when I was little. I guess Mom's voodoo curse really worked ("I hope you have a daughter just like you someday"). How do you discipline a baby before they understand right from wrong? One minute she is giving out the sweetest (and drooliest) kisses and the next she is smacking you in the face. *Sigh* is this really life with a toddler?

And so....our house is filled with things that go bump this season - whether it is the dog knocking over Hailey, the toilet seat being opened and closed, Hailey throwing her toys or smacking kids at daycare.

Whatever the bump is....it's usually not good (and it is usually followed by crying).

It's going to be a scary holiday!

Quick Pic

Just a quick post - the picture is too cute not to put my blog.

Hailey dancing with Daddy at her Uncle Brian and Aunt Laura's wedding last month.

Everyone together now.... "Awwwwww"

Flower Child

*Big Sigh*

We have just finished a very busy week - and as with all busy weeks, there comes that special time at the very end...the time to reflect on the week's happenings and blog.

This past week, my brother-in-law Brian got married. O.K., not technically - that actually happened the week before (that is a story for another time). This past weekend was the ceremony with all the bells and whistles...AND...a flower girl.

Laura, Brian's bride, asked if Hailey could 'stand' in their wedding and be the flower girl. At only (almost) 13 months old, I was skeptical about her ability to attend a wedding, much less participate in one. However, I would never stand in the way of a bride's desires - and so my daughter was added to the wedding party. I bought the cutest little party dress and with extra material from the bride's green dress, a sash was made that allowed Hailey to fit right in.

Even though she just learned to walk, having her actually propel herself down the isle would have taken forever and would have probably resulted in a frustration tantrum. So daddy (who was a groomsman) carried her and I walked beside her with a basket of rose petals for her to drop. I'm embarassed, but I'll say this right now for all the world to see (or at least the 4 people that actually read my blog)...

I totally underestimated my daughter.

I gave her a couple of rose petals as we walked, and (although she didn't drop them) she gripped one in each hand and showed everyone at the wedding her new petals. She was an absolute angel. When the ceremony began, daddy held her the whole time he stood with the wedding party. The only sounds she made were an occasional "Uh Oh" when she dropped a petal on the ground. She even leaned forward to listen to Brian and Laura's vows.

Once the reception got underway, she got out onto the dance floor with her daddy and her Aunt Angie. She danced and walked (right through a big dance circle to get her time in the spotlight). Hailey even stuck it out until the very end, when everything was cleaned up, all the gifts were in the car and the happy couple finally drove into the night. She let out a little giggle when she hit her car seat - apparently giddy to finally be able to sleep.

For her first wedding, she really impressed a lot of people with her patience, behavior, stamina and just sheer cuteness.

She is only ONE and her daddy has already walked her down the isle. The next time that happens... well...I can't even wrap my imagination around that yet, but I sure she'll be just as beautiful and I'll be just as proud. *Big Sigh*

The above photos are from the first wedding and the rehearsal - pictures of Hailey in her dress will be found at: http://www.flickr.com/photos/theyspot/ - when I get the chance to post them :)

It's Fun to be One!

Hello from ONEderland!

Hailey turned one year old a week ago, and in true Hailey style, it was memorable!

The evening before her first birthday (Thursday night), we had a really powerful 10 minute storm blow through Michigan which took out power for a lot of people - our house included.

After we got home from dinner...Hailey decided that it was a good time to do something special. Apparently, she really wanted to get in another 'first' before she turned one the next day, because with two flashlights trained on her...Hailey took her first steps!!!

Four big steps... all on her own with no support, no power and no CAMERA.
That's my girl!

While we had planned on taking her someplace special on her birthday (we intended on going to Saugatuck), Nathan and I spent the day moving our frozen food over to Mom and Dad's (ice cream soup...yuck!). We also decided that it was hard to have a party with no power, so we moved the next day's celebration over to Mom and Dad's house as well. That particular decision was pretty easy for me to make since I did not have the opportunity to get the doors back on my kitchen cabinets!

So, because Hailey missed out on a day trip to an artsy town on the big lake, we took her to the next best thing...Build-A-Bear Workshop! Nathan and I had a pretty good time 'helping' her pick out a bear and stuff it. Of course, we were more into it than she was (we almost came home with an entire bear wardrobe) but I think in the end she really liked 'Bug-A-Bear'. The rest of her birthday was spent playing at Grandma and Grandpa's house.



The party the next day was crazy! There were so many people there and so much food! I think Hailey was in a bit of a daze to have so much attention. She received so many great gifts and she really wanted to play with them all! She loved her books, 'CD player', cell phone and popper - all the gifts were perfect. The highlight of the whole day had to be when we gave Hailey her first birthday cake (banana cake with chocolate and pink frosting) - she went to town smashing it and eating cake by the handful. She was so messy, we had to give her a quick bath (sorry about the cake ring in the tub Mom!).The party was so much fun - and more than a little stressful with the last minute location change! I can't believe its really over!

And so my daughter is now one year old. Looking back, the whole event seems to me to paint a pretty good portrait of Hailey and her life:

* Forging ahead and 'taking steps' forward regardless of how dark it might be.
* Jumping in and enjoying life - even if it means you get cake in your nose and have to have a bath.
* Being surrounded by so much love that you can't even walk through a room without a hug and a kiss.

I hope you had a happy birthday Bug-A-Boo, you might be too young to remember it, but I certainly won't be forgetting it anytime soon!

(oh...the power came on at our house about 2 hours after the party finished)!

Letter to my Daughter

I have been a little remiss about posting lately, and I apologize to my throngs of rabid blog fans. The month of August has been a crazy one!

I have been 'hired' by the PNHS marching band - that has been taking up a LOT of my time and energy. Hailey's first birthday party is on the 25th of this month and (at this point in time) I have no doors on my kitchen cabinets. I am in the process of repainting them and the whole project has been one gigantic headache after another.

Even though my life has been a bit crazed to date...I cannot let the impending occasion of my daughter's first birthday pass without making a special note.

******************************************
A Letter To Hailey on Her First Birthday

My Dear Baby Hailey-

I wanted to take a moment to reflect and tell you how much you mean to me and how much the first year of your life has completely and totally changed mine forever.

You, your dad and I have all been on a road together, one that started even before you were born.

You may not realize this, but your daddy and I spent 5 years trying to have a baby and I was beginning to think that it was never going to happen. I said the words "Please, just one" over and over until they almost lost their meaning. The day I found out I was pregnant with you, was the day that the road your dad and I were walking on finally turned.

I think because of that, I had the most wonderful pregnancy. Daddy and I did everything we could to prepare ourselves for your arrival - but the road was one we had never been on before. I couldn't believe that I had such a strong connection with someone who I hadn't even met and near the end all I could think about was seeing your face. I was completely unprepared for how beautiful it would be.

When you were born - it was a total surprise, and a blur. I didn't have hours of labor and a long delivery to get me used to the idea that I was going to be a mom. One minute I was pregnant - the next, I was a mom. Your dad showed me a beautiful, wrinkly bundle of answered prayers, and then two of you were off. I remember lying there with a crazy mixture of absolute joy and crippling fear - you were perfect and I wanted the world to be perfect for you.

Now we are almost ready to celebrate your first birthday and since that first day, everything is different and yet nothing has changed. You have reached so many milestones and firsts and have grown so much - yet, just like the day you were born, this year has been a complete blur.

You and I spent a lot of time together early on - those days before I went back to work are priceless memories of love and frustration. Although you were so small and helpless, it is amazing the way you showed Daddy and me exactly how to care for you. The first part of that road wasn't always smooth, but each step got easier and easier to take. Since then, life has been a mad flurry of diapers and giggles.

Watching you through this year filled me with so much love and pride. I am beginning to see your incredible personality and sense of humor shine through. You and your daddy bring out the best in each other. When I watch the two of you play, I find a feeling that extends past the love I have for you as individuals.

Through all of the beautiful moments, there are also times of worry and fear. I am excited and anxious about the future. Just like when I was pregnant and couldn't wait to see your face, I want to know what your childhood will be like...I want to know that you will be happy.

I want to protect you without limiting you.
I want to encourage you without smothering you.

I want to teach you all the things I have learned and none of my own insecurities.

I don't ever want you to leave, but I want you to someday find your own road.

So I guess, until that time, you, Daddy and I will walk the road in front of us. Hopefully, we will know when to hold your hand and when to let go. I'm sure we will each trip occasionally, but as long as we are together, we won't stay down long. I can't wait to see where our road leads us Hailey Bug...even when you run ahead of us...we will always be on it with you.

I want the world to be perfect for you - you deserve no less.

Love
-Mommy

A Friend Indeed....

One of the reasons I am writing this blog, is so that I can keep an informal record of Hailey's childhood, what she was like, how she grew...etc. A side effect of doing this has been that I get to express my personal journey into motherhood, how I feel and how it effects my thoughts and who I am.

This past week, I was reminded of one of the big changes motherhood has brought to my life...that is in the area of friendships.

I will start by saying that even before I had Hailey, I did not have scores of friends. I am outgoing and friendly, but I do not 'collect' friendships. I would put it in the area of around 5 really close friends and another handful that I see (at varying degrees) when I get the chance. However, the favored five have been with me for a very long time (the oldest going back at least 36 years)! When I make a friend, it sticks. They have been with me for nearly every part of my life, good and bad and I would not change a thing about any of them, good or bad - save for one thing.....

Of these 5 really close friends....
ONE is married.

Now for those other 4 really close friends of mine who are reading this right now with their eyebrows raised and teeth clenched...this is not any type of judgement...read on and try to relax your jaws.

If you happened to be the first in your group of friends that got married, you understand where I am coming from...when you get married, life changes - a little.

You can still go out - maybe you need to ask.

You can still stay out - maybe you need to call.

Life is even easier if your significant gets along with your friends (I was fortunate in that regard). You have essentially only added another friend onto the pile. You still do what you want, you just start taking another person's feelings into consideration. O.k. maybe you stop trolling for guys - but you can troll for guys for your friends and that is actually more fun.

When you become a parent, everything is turned upside down.

Let's revisit the numbers again...5 friends - 1 married - 1 with children. That means I have one close friend who footsteps I can try to follow so that I don't end up hip deep in the snowbank of parental mishaps. One friend who can give an understanding nod when I get frustrated that Hailey continually smacks your face when you hold her and poops like she has a jet pack in her diaper. Granted, the children of 'the one' are quite a bit older than my daughter, but at least I rate a nostalgia factor.

When it comes to friendships, I feel very...alone. They warn you of this exact thing in Lamaze class. 'Set up a support system' they tell you. Who is going to want to be your support system when all you can talk about is bowel movements and car seats? I try not to talk about her too much with my friends, but when they ask, "What's going on with you?" you can either tell them about the latest tantrum or try to hide the slobber stain on your shirt and say "Not much".

I should add here that all of my five are wonderful with Hailey and love her to death - even those couple that don't really like kids.

But I have moments of pretty intense loneliness, and jealousy. They are off doing cool things for themselves, going on vacations, indulging themselves in hobbies and seeing other countries. I'm picking up pacifiers that are constantly being thrown and bartering babysitting time so we can go to a three hour movie. A few have made some amazing changes and decisions in their lives lately. Normally I would be on the front lines offering advice and cheering them on, but I often don't hear about it until it is an afterthought.

I knew that there was going to be a certain amount of isolation - particularly when you are an older mom like me. The few moms I have met...I don't have much in common with. Most of them need a little growing up themselves.

I know that things change, but the really important things in life shouldn't have to. Shouldn't I be able to be a good mom AND a good friend? If I have my cake, I should be able to eat it too...otherwise, what's the point of having cake in the first place?

Where I Live...

I was cleaning off my computer today and found this....I thought I would share....

This was made from a writing exercise someone at work sent me. _________________________________

I am from the mitten, from Vernor's Ginger Ale, the land of Tigers and Lions, of great lakes that look like oceans and pointing at your palm to show where you live.

I am from the two tone split level house with all the neighborhood kids inside, the pink refrigerator with the freezer on the bottom so you could get to the ice cream, the basement family room, the stairs with the wobbly wrought iron railing and the kitchen that smelled like toast and peanut butter.

I am from tulips in the spring, three shades of lilacs in an emerald green pitcher on the kitchen table and the bushes in the backyard with the little red berries that you aren't supposed to eat.

I am from tinsel on the Christmas tree and comic books in our stockings, presents from the cat, loud laughter and board games after dinner and visiting with neighbors. From names like Cleland and Gladys that teach you about grace and class and the meaning of the word 'family'.

I am from the dawn of the two family income and yet still had parents in the stands cheering at every game. I am from dancing to the Moonlighters, handmade Halloween costumes, homemade popsicles and all the other details I couldn't appreciate until I was much older.

From knowing that everything you put in your mouth would grow hair on your
chest, that a band aid and Kool-aid can both stop me from crying and learning that real artists don't have to color by the numbers.

I am from the games of baseball in the backyard where no grass grew on the 'bases' for years, from hand-me-down jerseys, my bike with the banana seat, purple pom-poms on my roller skates and a tote bag full of markers for coloring.

I am from Germany, England, Ireland, Scotland, the Motor City, Canada and right here in my home town. From potato salad in the summer, pumpkin pie in the fall and cherry tarts on my brother's birthday.

I am from vacationing in the popup camper, mistaken handprints in concrete, lawn chairs at little league games, running through the backyard sprinkler and finishing my mom's Sunday morning coffee so we could leave church early.

I am from the volumes and volumes of pictures in the top of the closet, the unfinished baby book, the shoe boxes full of slides but mostly from the countless stories told over and over that still make us laugh.

This is where I'm from.

Up, Up and Away...

OK...we had some pretty monumental events happen in our household this past weekend, a little blog update will catch everyone up to speed...

Hailey has been trying to pull herself up to a stand for about the past 2 weeks. Last week she did it: she pulled herself up using our living room chair and stood using her own strength for close to 2 whole seconds (with dad hovering right next to her)! Of course she crashed right back down again, but the determination she has is pretty amazing. She seems to have a slight issue with one of her legs not wanting to bend at the knee (you try standing up with one leg out in front of you) but she still manages to do it! It's like watching someone attempt a rock climbing wall for the first time.


This past Friday (June 8th), she started 'parroting' the word "Up". You say "Up" and she most definitely says "Up" right back. The jury is still out on whether or not she knows what "Up" means, or if she is just saying it because it makes everyone around her smile and say it back to her.

Which reminds me....what is in the rulebook about first words? I thought that her first word would be so obvious that you could confidently get it tattooed on your arm - but it isn't really like that. She has been saying DADADADADA and MAMAMAMAM for a while now, but not really in reference to us. It never stops after 4 letters, so I haven't counted it as a word. This time.... 'Up' is very clear, it isn't part of a run-on sentence and she repeats it right after you do. She seems to say it the most often when she is throwing a ball around. However, Nathan says it to her every time he lifts her out of her car seat (which let's face it...is a LOT).


I think the rules must be:

• It has to be one word, not an entire soliloquy of vowels
• She has to be able to say it again
• It has to have a connection to something - an action, object anything.
  

The last, but not least tidbit.... She crawled this weekend. We stopped by Grandma and Grandpa's house and she decided it was time to bust a move. Not far mind you, just enough to get her toy and sit back down, but she really put one knee in front of the other and moved herself forward. Most of the time, she gets up on both feet and does a little tri-pod action with her head - but she really used her knees this time.

That's it...game over...we're doomed. Actually, our stuff is doomed, and the dog...the dog is doomed too. Let the baby proofing commence!

What a wonderful week of firsts. Nine months hit and they come fast and furious. When moments like this happen, I find that I am absolutely astounded by the whole process of learning and discovery. I watch her eyes and can see her putting it together then looking at us for confirmation and cheers. It is the most amazing thing I have ever seen. I also have noticed that Nathan and I still have that connection...we still know what the other one is thinking. We had a lot of "Holy crap - did she just do that?!?" moments this weekend, without having to say a word to each other.

And so it begins...she's crawling, standing, starting to talk...she's going forward, getting bigger and as she would say....she's moving "UP"!

for more pictures visit http://www.flickr.com/photos/theyspot/

How does your garden grow?...

This weekend was less than delightful for a variety of reasons:

First of all, there was the weather - it rained most of the weekend. There was some nice weather Saturday morning, but Sunday was a complete waste.

I missed my annual outing with the girls. Every year on the first weekend of June, my girlfriends and I go to the local art fair downtown. This year we had to pass because... I believe....they are on vacation together. I didn't' realize how much I look forward to this event. Not only is it a chance to hang out with my friends, it keeps me in touch with those creative impulses of mine that usually get repressed for more pressing everyday chores.

Our power went out on Sunday. Just as Nathan and I were going to settle in to a nice rented movie. Fortunately, my parents still had power, so I guess you could say that we went out to a movie this weekend.

The biggest reason this weekend was a drag for me...gardening. During the time I should have been spending looking at overpriced artwork and agreeing with my girls that "We could do that" I was instead on my hands and knees pulling weeds and planting flowers.

I HATE gardening.

I do it because I only have to plant flowers once a year and my yard looks really pretty for months. However, it is a day that I dread every year, here is why:

• Dirt - you don't get a little dirty when you garden, you get really really filthy. Dirty to the point where you itch all over and you don't know if its sweat, bugs or both. I hate being dirty.
  
• Bugs - I hate bugs. My neighbors must has been pointing and laughing because I screamed at least five times while I was out there (3 toads that startled me, one spider on my back and a tree branch I didn't see until I ran into it).
  
• Knees - my poor, poor knees. My flowers are in a raised bed surround by brick blocks. Looks nice in the yard, not indented into my knees.

It doesn't matter how much I stretch out prior, my body is sore for 3 days after gardening. Near the end of my flats of impatiens, I realized that I was talking myself through it like a marathon runner..... "Just a half flat left to go...you can do it!"

My mother gardens beautifully, my mother-in-law even more so. Her gardens are amazing, a true master gardener who obviously loves working in the soil. I look at people who love to garden with the same curiosity as people who love running.

Gardening...is obviously not genetic.

If Hailey is going to learn to love to plant, it is going to have to be taught by someone else than me. someone who doesn't scream every time a bee buzzes past or break out in hives at the thought of gardening gloves.

Update Odds and Ends

Here are some quick updates on Hailey:

Sleep Wars - It looks like the rebel crib forces have finally started getting the upper-hand! Oh there is still resistance, but the crying only lasts about 15 minutes a night (as opposed to 1 -2 hours). In fact, last night...she only cried for 6 minutes - our Jedi mind tricks are finally working!

Teeth - I had no idea how long it takes baby teeth to come in! Her two front bottom teeth broke through her gums weeks and weeks ago, but are only lately starting to look like teeth. Last night she was so upset we decided to feed her fresh fruit in a 'fresh food feeder' for the first time (it's a little pacifier with a mesh bag). She cried and waved it around and fussed...until she put it near her mouth and realized it had peach slices in it! I have never seen her attack something so eagerly! It was hysterical - you could actually see the moment when she thought

"Oh...hang on...this tastes....good!!"

Crawling - She doesn't really crawl as much as she scoots her self ...um...backward. Which I guess is fine as long as she isn't in a hurry to get anywhere.

General Babyness - She is about 18 pounds now (to our best 'on-scale with baby, on-scale without' calculations). I keep worrying that she is too small, but I am comparing her with the other daycare babies who are either older or just plain bigger (much love to cutie Christopher). She is going to be 9 months old in 3 days and she is now wearing 9 month clothes (albiet, a tad roomy). If the Carter's baby clothes people say that's the size of a 9 month old, who am I to argue?

She has started to become a little parrot. You giggle, she giggles. You squeek, she squeeks. The dog barks...well she sometimes does too. It so adorable and so cute. I am making sure I am writing this down - so that in the future I can refer to this post and remember that, yes indeed... I did think it was cute once.

Pictures - Yep... I saved this for one of the last updates. After Christmas, I swore I wouldn't take her back for pictures until after she could sit up unassisted. Here you have it - visual evidence of our dwindling checkbook. If there is one thing I have learned about myself as a mom, it is that I am an absolute sucker when it comes to pictures of my kid - I cannot say no.





Worrying - I have a whole new batch of things which stress me out now. Not obsessively - more like 'having to check that all the doors are locked before going to bed' types of worries. Is she eating enough? Is she eating the right things? Are we moving too slow on food variety? As you can tell, the eating part is a worry trigger for me. Maybe because I really want to do right by her when it comes to food, maybe because I used to be a food source.

I get a little wiggy about sleeping too - just because our daughter is a 'stomach-side-knees-head-butt in the air' sleeper and everything you see warns you to put her on her back. We put her there, she just doesn't stay there. I know she is fine but... holy cow that kid can flip around in bed.

Being a Mom - I love it. It is all encompassing, good and bad. Nathan and I have left Hailey several times with her grandma and grandpa and gone out as a couple, and even after a few hours I start to miss her.

It's tiring.

At home we seem to barter time back and forth just so that we can do normal everyday things. "Can you watch her for a second?" has replaced "I Love You" and "What do you want for Dinner?" as the most spoken sentence in our house ("What character are you playing?" comes in a not-so-distant 4th. If you really know us, then you understand that one).

It's stressful.

Then... she makes some crazy noise that makes both of us just start laughing or she farts and smiles at you like she just created a symphony. Better yet... you watch her discover the world around her - like the little mesh bag with the peach slices in it....

and it's worth it. Totally worth it.

Sleep Wars

A short time ago...in a nursery far, far away...

O.K., so it's not far away, it's right across the hall from our room.

But to Hailey, it might as well be on another planet!

Let me start this entry off by saying that Hailey is a very, very good baby...AND...I'd like to think that we are good parents (so far). However, when it comes to her bedtime, we have really missed the mark.

Our normal routine is to have her with us (or one of us) until we are ready for bed. At that point she is usually asleep and we lay her down in a bassinet next to our bed. Sometimes she wakes up, sometimes she doesn't. If she wakes up, then it doesn't take much to assure her that we are right there and she just needs to go back to sleep. After that... she sleeps like a champ - solid- all through the night.

At this point, some of you may be having an inner dialogue about the mistakes that we have already made. Let me just say that (at least for us) we are gone from her so much during the day that spending as much time as we can with Hailey at night... seems right. Putting her down at 8:00 pm just doesn't give me enough time. If that makes me selfish, then to this point, I wear that badge proudly.

Now the problem is...that routine isn't working any more. With her new strength and mobility, the bassinet has become unsafe and we simply can't use it anymore. That leaves the crib. The huge, beautiful, convertible crib that we bought with the expensive developmental mobile hanging over it.

She HATES it.

Or more to the point, she hates being in it alone in the nursery. She kicks, screams, cries, howls, yowls - anything and everything to let us know that she does not like laying in that crib. We have stood over her and reassured her, we have gone back at timed intervals, we let her cry it out.... nothing seems to be working.

I have to tell myself that she is mad and not scared. If I think she is crying because she is frightened that we left her and aren't coming back, I'd run back in that room so fast I'd burn the socks off my feet. If I think she is just mad at us, then it becomes a matter of wills and a test for future parenting - one that if we loose now, Nate and I better just start saving for the pony. Stick a fork in us - we're done.

This is just been so tough. Tough on her, tough on us as parents, tough on us as a couple. No one is getting enough sleep so that makes days harder than they should be. We have been struggling with this for a while, but have always come back to the bassinet because it worked. It made us feel like good parents who are close to their daughter and rewarded with blissful, long periods of sleep.

Now it's cold turkey and I feel like its back to square one. I remember the days immediate following her birth where her nights and days were switched. I paced and rocked her while she cried until 5:00 am. Ugh. Just the memory of that is enough to keep me awake at night.

Maybe, if we are patient, and believe in the power of 'The Force', Hailey will begin to see that the crib isn't all evil, that there is some good left in the crib - it can return from the dark side and she and the crib can live in harmony together.

My favorite time of day

I am really surprising myself with this post by stating something I never thought I would hear myself say:

"My favorite time of the day is when I first wake up in the morning".

No really. I'm not bluffing. Seriously, its the first twenty minutes after I wake up. Those of you who know me really well, probably cannot imagine me typing that with a straight face.

I have my reasons - or reason - which is of course Hailey. She is the only thing that could ever, possibly make me love the moments directly following the silencing of the alarm clock.

Lately, when I have been getting up for her morning feeding, I bring her into our bedroom and lay her on our big 'body pillow' - the more relaxed she is, the easier it is to feed her (and how can you not be relaxed on a body pillow?). Well... there is something about our room and the light filtering in from our window that makes my daughter look absolutely flawless. Don't get me wrong, she is a beautiful child at any time, but with the pale blue morning light...she is perfection. The redness around her mouth from her slight 'pacifier rash'...gone, as is the scratch which resulted from her mom & dad's inability to catch the latest long fingernail in time.

I'd say she looks like a doll or an angel, but that is pretty cliche (besides, dolls kinda creep me out). She looks like, a painting - from one of the great renaissance masters. An artist of light and texture who can capture the way light plays off of the few wispy hairs atop her head and can make you feel the softness of her cheek. Even the little morning eye crusties look like jewels just waiting for a crown. I would love to take a picture of that moment, but I doubt a camera could catch it.

She throws her hands behind her head and sighs when I replace the bottle with the pacifier and then I get to snuggle the body pillow with her on it.

I could stay like that all day. What job, what career could ever be more important than that moment?

Baby Fix

Apparently, I have been catching a lot of flack (from various sources) about my absence of Hailey pictures and updates over the last few posts.

Well...for those of you who need their dose of cuteness...here you go.

Hailey wore a dress with tights for the first time on Tuesday. She's so proud of them, she wanted to show them off for the camera. What a great leg stretch... where do I sign her up for dance classes? Does she have to know how to walk first?

As if you couldn't tell from the picture, she is developing quite a little personality.

• She is a gigantic people watcher.
• She farts like a Weber - I'm so proud!
• Much to Nathan's dismay, she likes the boys.
• She loves mom's necklaces and glasses.
• She really likes sleeping in.
• She does NOT like to be woken up.
• She smiles and giggles all the time, particularly at daddy and Harley.
• She is really alert and watches everything - in fact it seems she fights naps because she doesn't want to miss anything.
• She is almost always on (what our daycare lady calls a...) 'Sunny Day'.
• To relax, she always puts her hands behind her head and plays with her ears.
  

Hailey will be 8 months on the 24th. She isn't crawling yet, nor does she have any teeth. However, she really wants to crawl (darn legs) and chews everything in sight!

She is over her first cold but is still a booger factory. She hates having her face wiped...HATES it! We started her on solids months ago and the only thing we have found that she doesn't like is oatmeal.

Hailey loves her exersaucer, her key ring and the dog. She has started putting consonant sounds together and says 'buh' 'da' and 'muh' (so far) but they don't mean anything yet and she really just likes talking to the TV and Harley. We have her pacifier on a clip and she swings it around so hard, we call it her Nuk-Chuck (like numchuck..get it...? Yeah...ok...silly, I know).

She doesn't have what I would call fingernails - claws or talons would be a better term. Her eye is still occasionally goopy from her blocked tear duct, but it is much better. She is getting more hair every day, it is sandy blonde and most of it runs straight down the center of her head!

She is really pretty amazing.

Although I may seem distracted and tardy posting blogs on my baby daughter...believe me...I know how lucky I am to be able to write these updates and take these pictures. She is my little miracle in pink tights and I love sharing her with everyone.

For more pictures of Hailey go to my Flickr site [click here]

Friday Feast

I just realized that I have been writing in this blog for a full year now! Don't mind the fact that there were three months in which I didn't write anything - it's still been a year and that is pretty darn good for me.

To mark the occasion - I will do a very 'bloggeresque' entry today and answer questions to the 'Friday Feast' list of questions:

Feast One Hundred & Thirty Six

Appetizer- Who is your favorite news anchor/reporter? Why? As I read 98% of my news online, I would have to say that Anderson Cooper is my favorite reporter. I liked his reporting on the war in Iraq. He seems very caring and real - plus it doesn't hurt that he is really, really hot.

Soup - Name 3 foods that are currently in your freezer. Outdated frozen berry cobbler, outdated frozen Hot Pockets, outdated frozen swirl ice cream bars (see a pattern here?)

Salad - If you were to have the opportunity to name a new town or city, what would you call it? Denial....think about it....

Main Course - What will most likely be the next book you read?

A Long Way Gone: Memoirs of a Boy Soldier by Ishmael Beah - this looks like an amazing book.

Dessert - What's the first thing you notice about the opposite gender? If they look like Anderson Cooper or not.

Adulthood

Now that I am a mom, an 'older' mom at that, I have spent some time thinking about the stages in life and what defines these stages.

I have been particularly focused on what marks the entry into adulthood. My search has concentrated on the milestones we reach that upon reflection we say to ourselves "I'm all grown up now" (or more true to reality) "Crap, do I feel old!". I am not discussing adulthood in terms of those 'all but brief' college years when you think you are an adult just because you don't get carded at the bar - I'm talking about real adulthood. I'm looking at the moment when you wake up one day and feel OLD, really old - and wonder: how did I get here?...what happened to me?....for God's Sake, when did I buy a lawnmower?!?

I have narrowed it down to two rites of passage that sneak up on you so gradually, that you don't even realize they have happened:

#1 - You begin to make your own doctor appointments.

There are several factors into why this does not happen until you truly become an adult. First off, in your 20's and even early 30's...you are invincible! Sure you may get an occasional cold, but everyone does! You can't run off to the doctor's office for a cold! Who does that? Unheard of! Besides, he may put you on medication that prevents you from drinking alcohol! Unheard of! Of course the other factor in not seeing the doctor when you are young is a simple equation: no money + no insurance = no doctor. The day you begin to make your own doctor appointments marks the day you become a responsible adult. Period. You have money, you have insurance, you have a sense that "Holy cow, I have to start taking care of my body - or its not going to last". Then, there is a whole other, deeper layer to this milestone - the annual appointment (that you keep). For those who are confused at that....those are appointments you make when you are not sick! Yes it happens, and yes, that makes you old! It's called preventative medicine - Google it..it exists!

#2 - You start to analyze what food affects you in what ways.

Unless your parents have had you medically diagnosed with food allergies when you were young, no child has ever been heard to say..."No ice cream for me please, I'm lactose intolerant!". When you are young you eat food, that's it...you just eat. There is no weighing the alternatives of going to Taco Bell...you just go (particularly after a long night of not being carded at the bar). As an adult - a true adult- you learn that you have to project ahead 8 hours to what you will be doing before you eat something. "Oh I better not have that lasagna, I have to be on a plane tomorrow". You just don't see teenagers parked in the bathroom moaning that they are never going to eat that meat lovers pizza again. Doesn't happen. Damn the torpedos, full speed ahead! Extra spicy, extra salty...cooked in lard? Great, tastes better that way!

Lastly, there is a final, beautiful combination of the two milestones that lets you know you are truly arrived at penultimate adulthood...analyzing the food you eat before going to a doctor's appointment. "Oops, can't have that before my appointment - can't have that blood sugar raised!" At that point, you know you have arrived.

Well, for those of you who have made it, welcome. Have some soy milk and read a magazine, the doctor is running a little late today. For those too young to get it yet, relax...have some Taco Bell, you're going to live forever anyway.

Winter Guard 180

I am really beginning to enjoy the winter guard season again. This year started out really good, a great set of kids and a wonderful show. However, somewhere down the line it got a little out of hand, a little...aggressive - kids vs. staff. They weren't behaving the way we wanted them to, so we screamed a lot and lectured them even more. Every time that happened...and we yelled at them to improve their attitude...they got worse and worse.

So our director, who has always been a particularly clever person, had the insight to completely change the attitude of the staff. We have made strides to be positive and patient and to (in his words) "not want it more than the kids do".

And guess what...

the kids' attitudes changed too. They are behaving closer to what we hoped for than I have ever seen before. Practices have been delightful and everyone is in a better mood. Even this past weekend, when we all had to be at practice at 6:00 am on Saturday, everyone was tired, but in a good mood (unheard of!). We have all shifted from trying to achieve perfection at all costs, to having a fun and doing the best we can. That might sound like a no-brainer, but when you are in the middle of it, it is not so easy to see. Even with all the talent these kids have, are we going to come close to winning this year..?...No. Are we going to have fun and enjoy each other's company..?..that is already happening.

I think it is fortunate that our director took a moment to see it from the kids' perspective and weigh what was more important - for everyone. It is a lesson that I hope I can remember years from now if my daughter and I are at odds. Stop and take a look from the other point of view. Sometimes its o.k. to ease up and see the situation for what it really is. Not only is is wise to choose your battles, but also the way in which you fight them. It may turn out in the end to be the only way anyone is going to win.