One of my best friends had to give her beloved dog away yesterday. I won't get into details - let's just say there was an incident that made her have to choose between putting him down or finding a new home for him. To her credit, she made the decision to find him a home when many people around her were pressing her to take him to the vet's. There was a tremendous amount of pressure and stress - and her life was not happy as a result.
I thought about that today after I dropped Hailey off at the sitter's house. Again I drove to work crying. I thought about how the price of love forces us to make hard decisions in our life. I had to give up my days with Hailey so that I can go to work and provide for her. Palee had to give up her dog in order to save his life.
Both were hard decisions.
Both were the right decisions.
Both hurt like hell.
However, I realized something else today...
My daycare provider is close enough to where I work that I can go to see her at lunch time (if I am able). Today, I did just that - went to see Hailey at lunch. You know what...? She was fine. She was better than fine, bouncing in her bouncy chair, smiling, having a good time. I held her hand until she fell asleep and went back to work. She is o.k. - I'm the one that is a mess. Driving back to work, I really felt like Hailey's mom. I became her mother the day she was born - but I have made a sacrifice for her (of more than just sleep) so I finally feel like a mom.
Decisions like the ones Palee and I have made this week are a lot harder on us than on our children or pets. The price of love is that sometimes you do all the hurting - so that the ones you love the most don't have to hurt at all. My baby is at daycare and Palee's baby is with a new family. Our decisions were tough, but they are going to keep roofs over both of their heads.
They are going to be fine, both of them.
Eventually, Palee and I will be fine too.
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